Originally Written: 22-Mar-2020
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Meaning, the way we feel is often rooted in what sheep we put out to pasture.
When we do not permit certain ways of being or feeling to enter our lives, we carry a sense of denial over our experience.
Everyone can relate to the concept of pain.
Everyone can relate to feelings of frustration, heartache, and anxiety.
What not everyone can relate with is a person who relates with others based on their pain.
People don’t need to know your story, there is no need to cultivate a profile, just to think you deserve some respect.
You already deserve respect.
There is no need to prove oneself to anyone but the self and that is in whatever ways we choose to represent for ourselves.
For me, it is my fears related to connecting with others.
I’m always afraid I’m fucking things up.
I’m always feeling like I’m a step behind.
When I’m really falling like a step ahead.
When I’m really just in over my head.
In over my head on a lot of things.
If there’s one thing I can at least feel grounded in during times of great uncertainty and fear, it is in the feeling of my experience.
Sometimes you just need to marinate in your own suck and experience the feeling of being a loser to some of the things you want.
Sheep only go out to pastures where the grass is tall. Our minds latch onto what will feed its own ruminations about how the present is going.
When we close the gates to bountiful pastures of feeling, what we are doing is shutting ourselves off, repressing the emotion. When we finally do open ourselves up to feeling ways we restrain ourselves from feeling, our minds feed off these feelings and become latched to the experience.
All feelings we feel are temporary. Your worst of the worst and best of the best times all have one thing in common: they ended.
That’s the beautiful part about pain, it is just a sign you are alive and breathing. But suffering is a choice. If your arm was bleeding, you would apply pressure to the wound and dress it appropriately. If new emotions have cracked open, tend to them mindfully and with compassion.
We deserve to feel like we can feel what we’re feeling without someone trying to tell us how we’re supposed to feel about something.
Everyone has a story.